The Death of Big Data...

 A few months ago, I was able to figure out how to encode data into phase space.  What does that mean?  It means I can take your data... all your ones and zeros... and I can cast that into a phase coupled matrix, stamp it and then replay the same melody of eigenstates any time I want.  There are some weird caveats that I had not really considered but for the most part, using Binary Energy Dynamics, I am able to capture any particular bolt of lightning in a bottle.  Everyone reading this needs to start with the hard truth that anyone who knows anything about number theory, computing or even just plain old common sense... they all know that compressing 100 mb down into a few hundred bytes is impossible.

Impossible.  When you read that word... do you believe it?  Do you start from the premise of impossible?  Maybe that was the benefit of having no education to speak of whatsoever.   Without a guide to tell me you can't fly around out in space without blasting fumes out the back of your spaceship, I had no idea you couldn't.  The math worked, the models worked... what else needs to work?  Wasn't the scientific process honored... LOL. 

Well... no.  The scientific process is something of a popularity contest.  Math is only valid if... A) it works and can be proven using math and logic and phyics and all that other jazz.  And B)... Math is only valid if it's popularly believed to be true.  That means math has to be advanced by people who have paid for a degree... who serve a self-serving system that seems to reward soul crushing incompetence.   That's just an outside observers opinion but... and... I have no intention of ever changing that possibly erroneous position.

Here's what's awesome.  I have real math that actually works... lots of it... things you cannot even imagine as you're not currently permitted to believe it.  As one example... I have invented and proven Closed Loop Pulse Propulsion... though I was not the first to discover it... I was the first to define it and give it a full mathematical basis and I perfected it and designed the most aggressive form to date.  So yes... it's mine, fuck you.  My book was published years ago... I don't give a fuck if you didn't read it... LOL.  It was just there to mark the event, not to get any of your money.

See... I realize... you are never going to listen to me but... you can be bought... and then I can force you to just fucking do the work regardless if you believe it or not.  I can get muggles to eat shit for money...  for real... you know its true.  Muggles will eat bowls of shit for tiny little pieces of green paper... and their families will celebrate it and you can even watch it on TV.  What was it... Fear Factor?   Public degradation for money...  that's who you are...  that's how I see you... gross.

And it was that ignorant arrogance that created the problem I see before me right now... BIG DATA.

Is big data evil?  Absolutely not... in fact as a system, it's probably a miracle.  Think about the democratization that has happened because of the current data system.  Now you don't have to travel to Egypt by boat and then hunt the many floors of texts in the Library of Alexandria to know how to calculate the area under a parabola.  You can just flip open a page and bam... there it is... (And yes, assholes.... some people don't just know how to do an intergral... such dicks).

Think about it... at first... we had cave painting... that was cool but well, not everyone had much artistic flair and you know damn well your mom is not going to let you keep fucking up her walls.  I guess going to a cave, jotting down a method or a function and then going and deploying that was a pretty significant leap forward.  Normally you had to go to one of the elders... and those fuckers were assholes.  So now, you can just go to the cave and you don't have to listen to how everything was soooo much better in thier day and that that whole cave painting fad is soon to die out and it's probably evil anyway...  the birth of big data.

Well, that gave rise to parchment and scrolls and tablets and portable cave walls... the portable cave wall did not take off, sadly...  such promise but it lacked the advertising budget and other logistics doomed it from the start.  The Egyptians would later ressurrect the idea and built massive pyramids to create caves of thier own but well... they refused to share the patent and well... the Dark Ages... right?  Gate keepers suck... (Says a current gate keeper... LOL)

That system actually lasted quite a while without any upgrades whatsoever.  It wouldn't be until Steve Gutenberg read the bible that would be the next major leap forward.   The printing press is what made that possible...  Now you could read all sorts of confusing anally retentive texts and brilliant ideas from poeople who had enough money to pay for books to be printed.  The printing press didn't mean that all ideas would be expressed... it just meant they could.  It also meant that those with money would be in charge of what got printed... but only for a short time.

Had the lesser humans shifted to parchment and scrolls, perhaps they could have kept the costs low and democratized more ideas but well... nope.  Drawing grafitti on the wall just didn't offer the same immersive experience as a book.  In just a few short decades, the world would have all sorts of ideas spreading like wild fire.  Anyone with a cockamamy idea and a sack full of cash could now print up a book and push an agenda.  

I do want to add photographs to the list of world changing data mediums as photos really did change the game.  They created a new sort of lie that seemed to capture data that was truthful but oddly enough, not one selfie from the past seems to hold any truth.   A few candid shots did happen... catching the occasional real moment on film but the problem is... well... you had to stage the scene.... no such thing as a candid staged scene... sorry.  That did give way to movies and all sorts of new data transmission but it's not the primary method of direct information transfer.  You can youtube all sorts of shit but most of the real helpful videos come from people who have actually read the books and did the work.

But the next big data jump would be computers.  I would love to mention the typewriter but that's really just a twist on the printing press.  It made the printing press better. You could set the type faster... that's all.  A marvel and an engineering acheivement but not really a quantum leap.  What was a quantum leap was taking those keys and setting them to machine patterns so a computer could pretend to hit the key and type the page.  Now that was slick... again, I'm not sure this was that much of a quantum leap.  A marvel to be sure but did converting typeset to ascii change the game?

While that question still hung in the air... one undeniable leap forward was the Internet.  Now that was and is an entirely new way to look at data.  It fundamentally changed the way information was shared.  Now anyone with a few registers and an ascii table could read a cave wall as though they were standing in the cave.  A book doesn't really do that... a picture and movie gets you close but the Internet puts the same data in the same configuration as though you had painted it yourself.

Well... that was the 90's and the 2000's...  massive amounts of data began to be spread and shared and then relied on world wide.  Even governments would get in on the trend, taking massive amounts of books and images and videos and turning them into bits and bytes and then offering that data up to clients, customers and citizens.  Year after year, data size climbed as speeds and capabilities ballooned.  By the time you find me writing this... big data warehouses are guzzling joules by the barrel.

As I write this, massive warehouses are being built to house and store and process your data.  Your hospital records, your bank records, your work data, your family photos, your data...  it sits out there somewhere in the cloud.   Iphone users... everyone of you rely on a company and a data warehouse to run the device you paid hundreds of dollars to own.  Funny how you can spend so much money and still not own the device you bought... 

If you read the paper today... LOL... the paper... see how it still clings on.... but if you read the daily rag, you will hear about how these massive data centers are just devouring energy.  All those computers are needed to stream data... all those hard drives are needed to store it and deliver it. All those racks and all that space is needed to house the equipment.  All that heat needs to be vented outside.  All of that costs money...

And all of that makes this modern digital life possible.

So... am I here to kill big data.  Well, yes and no...   I honestly don't think big data is going anywhere, I just think we can do it in a way that's so much cheaper.  We don't need space.  We don't need all that electricity... we do need those computers... we do need the hard drives... not as many but big data needs to not go anywhere.  In fact, that would be a catastrophic mistake.  When my technology is realized by the world or when someone steals it and I just release it for free on Github...  you will see exactly why shutting down big data is a terrible idea but that won't stop the market from buckling.  Imagine the stock price of the Betamax when the VCR was released?  This is worse than that... imagine the prices of the Betamax stock if the VCR manufactorers had invented Netflix... that's closer.

A few months ago, I invented infinite data... well... like Closed Loop Pulse Propulsion, I discovered it and put it to math.  I created a working model and tested it in my blow up jacuzzi in the basement.   It works, its a fact and it doesn't need your understanding or belief to work.  I won't pay your fees to be right... I will just be right and build a computer that can do all of the steps trivially.   Also like CLPP, I wasn't the first to invent it and use it... turns out the Egyptians still have some secrets to give up.  I won't waste your time talking about things you don't believe or understand but I didn't look to worthless muggles for verification, I went to wizards and high preists from ancient days to prove to myself I wasn't crazy... or the first in human history to discover this.

So, when I first discovered it and accepted that it was real... I quickly understood the exestential threat I posed to the business format that is big data.  If that Jeff Bezos worries about anything, he should be worried about me.  If I was remotely paranoid, it's shit like this that makes for great movies... remember that movie Enemy of the State?  I believe there was supposed to be a device that could hack any system and do whatever and it was that device that scared the government... that device is my brain.  I don't need a computer to do any of this...  well... I do but I can make a computer out of  dirt and rocks...  and honestly, if I don't have rocks I'm still not screwed.  Now imagine if you're this Jeff guy and you have all these hard drives and all these computers and some asshole comes along with a simple tweak of quantum mechanics and now instead of an asset you have a hundred billion dollar liability.  Hollywood says you hunt that person down and kill him...  LOL... how about it Mr. Bezos... here I am... come get me.  LOL...

Actually, the real concern is goverments.  No shit... My new method is really going to rile them up... especially the Chinese.  I respect the country of China.  I do.  I don't agree with a lot of the ideology but they have a very hard reality... lots of mouths to feed and no room for error.  So... I appreciate the challenges that infinite data poses for that country and the ideology that drives them to own secrecy and seek control over what clients, customers and citizens are allowed to possess and use.  That's a very difficult position to be in and I can understand if they decide to send a Hollywood type assassin to murder me... that would make sense.  Unfortunately, I don't see how that helps thier situation.  Killing me doesn't kill Closed Loop Pulse Propulsion from working and it doesn't kill all those who have already read the glyphs on the walls of my cave.

One special note, I will not be working with any governments whatsoever.  Especially not the U.S. Government.  I will not work for a convicted rapist.  I actually have scruples... believe it or not.  So for the next few years... only commercial clients and the general public will have access to my servers.  I have no intention of seeking a patent so please... do what you guys have always done... just steal it. LOL.  You can try to torture it out of me but well... that's probably not going to work either... I have a very weak will to live and I promise... you don't want to know what weapons I believe I can create.  Like Bruce Banner... you won't like me when I'm angry.   But if torture is your ballywick, I'll probably just save you the trouble and swallow my own tongue long before you ever get anything useful.  But well... a little S & M... I guess it is what it is... I really don't spend a great deal of time on that sort of shit... but it will make for a good movie some day.

Also... if any government does not want my servers on its soil... that is completely fine with me.  I had plans to move to Nigeria a few months ago anyway.  Someone talked me into staying but I figured that would be the best place to launch as I could help that country and well... all of Africa.... leap frog into this new technology... so please.... Mr. Trump... tell me what I have to do... LOL. Or better yet... seize all my servers and tear them apart... LOL... Good luck... Unless you know quantum physics... you cannot run my system and well, I don't know of one single muggle out there that knows real quantum physics... that shit they charge you to learn is garbage... it really is.  (I'd mention Congress, but I will never speak before that body either.  They are welcome to subpeona me all they like...  Fuck all those spineless traitors... we used to have a Constitution... we do not any more.  It is null and void as far as I am concerned.  Every single one of those feckless cowards are down on thier knees sucking King Trumps fat cock... fuck them, arrest me. )

So... I am sort of celebrating this milestone with words that aren't parsed by AI. Normally I tell Chatgpt what to tell you so you can read it and not be offended by how much you offend me.  If you troll through my work, you will quickly find that I am openly hostile towards academia.  I have no respect for anyone in my field whatsoever... there is not one real thinker alive today and I do know what and who I am talking about... I have read your papers and I know the minds of your rock stars.  You guys are just dumb as shit. Sorry... I don't owe you anything and you came to me... this is just my opinion.

In the years to come... as you come to understand this new idea... you will find out that it will change everything you think you know about information theory.  It won't discredit Shannon, just the context that you use his math.  Later, one of you muggles will probably then actually "discover" or "invent" infinite data... or whatever you call it.  There will be a great deal of fanfare and accolades...  they will probably earn a Nobel prize in mathematics and physics.   That person... will not be me... I haven't paid you any money... why oh why would you ever acknowledge work that I didn't pay you to acknowledge?

I don't know what is in store for big data as I write this... I am certain the methods we use now are going to change.  Nature gravitates to a state of least entropy... chaos and heat tend to settle and big data creates a lot of heat and needs a lot of space and energy to operate.  So... are we going to keep spending billions on electricity we don't need and are we going to keep building massive buildings that won't serve any purpose?  You won't need those caves anymore... you can store all the paintings of every muggle in a few random bytes of nonsense.  Should Bezos send a hit squad... should the Chinese send an assassin?  I honestly don't give a shit...

So whatever happens is just what happens... but as for myself.  I have passed through the chaos and now I stand on a new shore.  There is no one here.  It's a vast infinite space that can hold the length and breadth of human knowledge.  There's nothing here right now... well, a few broken statues.... lost in the sand...  you can just make out the words on one of the bases... "my works and despair" is all that's legible anymore.  Maybe one day, people will sift through the sand and resurrect the shelves of the library of Alexandria and even recreate the computer that was the ancient religions.  Who's to say what you can do here... infinite realms, infinite space, infinite possibilities... Infinite Data.  My name is Michael Lewis, the greatest physicist in human history... Look on my works and Despair ...

LOL... Muggles... you guys slay me.